I wish I may... I wish I might...

Hello again,
Today was one of those days where you stop and think but before I do that I guess I must go back some. Recently a lady from La Universidad Autonoma de Guadalajara (the medical school in Mexico) asked me to consider applying to their program. I was obviously reluctant because I want to stay home or at least in the United States. Not that there is anything wrong with Mexico, but home is here for me. So back to today, at the clinic, I was deeply saddened at the way some of the personnel there treat the patients. The physicians are all amazing and do the best with what they can but some of the medical assistants, LVN's, etc treat the patients as if they were inferior and a bother. The majority of the nurses and assistants there are Hispanic who speak better Spanish than they probably do English, however I HARDLY ever see them speak to a patient in Spanish. Instead they just bark out commands: "Sit down", "Stay in your room", "I already told you..." which in turn just scares the patient more since they don't understand and they are being yelled at at the same time. I have also seen these nurses walk in the room without saying a work, toss things around until they find what they want, take a throat culture, blood sample, etc. and just leave the room without saying a word to the patient. This... I cannot find words for. It makes you sad and angry and confused all at the same time because you cannot understand how people can be this way. At the same time this whole experience is making me realize the type of person and hopefully one day physician that I do not wish to become and will do my best to always keep that in mind. These patients are not coming to the clinic for fun, they need our help and to take that position for granted.. its just .. I don't even know what to call it. As I do my best to translate for these patients, I find myself stumbling on words that are obviously not in everyday home Spanish (unless you come from a family of doctors which I do not) like triglycerides, lipids, BMI, etc. Even coming home and asking what the words are, my parents cannot tell me. Today I fully understood how much these patients need me. And not me per say but the translations I am providing. I understood that a little extra effort goes a long way as a patient left in tears as she was hugging me for being such a help as she explained to me she's usually scared to ask questions because she felt people were bothered. Another patient told me how proud she was of me for going to school, and aspiring something better for myself, as often times our culture seems to fall short in. Like I said today was really an eye opener. Maybe going to school in Mexico wouldn't be such a bad idea after all. I would love to become completely fluent , dive completely into the culture that I love so much, and essentially help end this gap between Spanish speakers and their doctors. I feel like a child wishing to be an astronaut or something, but like Gandhi said: I must be the change I wish to see in the world.

Until next time...